It's not about me

So I will be the first to admit I have BIG dreams for my son.  Basically I already have his whole life planned out.  Well that is until yesterday when the Lord whispered in my ear, "Alayna, his life is about me."  We get caught up.  Caught up in our wants, what the world wants, what we wanted for ourselves.  O to the simple life. 
Living in Belize for three months during my last semester of college was the most amazing time of my life.  IT WAS SIMPLE.  Our shower was a water hose stuck through a hole in this shack, no blow dryers, makeup, cellphone, tv.  The day I landed and finally got to the shack I would be calling home, I took a shower and got out the blowdryer.  My professor laughed and said, "I told you girls not to bring blowdryers and makeup."  Ugh I was thinking if I just looked better, I might feel better about being stuck out here in the remote nothingness.  So I continued blowdrying my hair and blowdrying and blowdrying.  Well, well, well because it is so humid it was impossible to dry my hair.  I had a freak out moment-NO BLOWDRYER AND NO MAKEUP FOR THREE MONTHS?  How would people look at me.  It was the beginning of a real period of freedom in my life. 
One day I was talking to a local and we were joking about how "poor" all the locals were.  Ok well perhaps I was the only one joking about no air conditioning, no cell phone, internet.  He politely informed me that they just had less stuff to get in the way of them and God.  Wasn't expecting that comment.  I thought about it alot that summer.  And time to time I still do.  I wouldn't mind living that way for the rest of my life.  We work so hard to get straight A's, to get into a good school, to get a good job, to be able to pay for the nice house and the BMer (BMW for those of you who aren't familiar with the term). So caught up in making enough to send your  child  to a good school, pay for every activity that they or YOU want them to join, and to be able to buy them the coolest clothes or shoes. 
As a parent, do we sit down and think of the example we are setting for our child?  Is that what it's all about?  The corporate job, the awesome house with granite countertops, and the two seater Mercedes?
Luke 9:61-62 says:
"Still another said, I will follow you, Lord; but first let me goback and say good by to my family."  Jesus replied, "No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God."
That was a real wake up call for me yesterday.  What if Ethan doesn't want to play football at LSU?  (you may laugh, but I am serious about pushing him in that direction)  What if he doesn't want to go to college at all?  What if he wants to live like a guy I once met, named Donnie Martimer?  Donnie went to an Ivey League school, drove the BMer and then sold it all including his clothes when he got the the call from the Lord.  I used to think I would be proud to have a son like that, but now that I am a parent I think I might just die if I had busted my butt to give my child everything for him to sell it all and live like a vagabond. 
So it's me, it's me that has to realize that I have to change.  I have to be a real life example to my child.  I refuse to live in a house of "do what I say, not what I do."  It starts with me.  More importantly, it starts with me realizing that it's not about me.  Not a little bit, not at all.